Self-care advice often sounds like it was written for someone with unlimited energy, time, money, and motivation.
If you’re living with ADHD, depression, anxiety … or all three at once, that kind of advice can feel impossible. Sometimes even basic things feel heavy. Sometimes just getting through the day is the achievement.
This is self-care for real life.
No perfection. No hustle. No shame.
Lower the Bar. On Purpose.
Self-care doesn’t need to be impressive.
It doesn’t need to be aesthetic.
It doesn’t need to “fix” everything.
If something helps even a little… it counts.
Lowering the bar isn’t giving up. It’s meeting yourself where you are and choosing kindness instead of pressure.
If You Can’t Get Out of Bed, That’s Okay
Some days, getting out of bed feels like climbing a mountain. On those days, self-care can look like staying put and doing one tiny thing:
• sipping water
• taking your meds
• stretching your toes
• opening a window
That’s not nothing. That’s care.
Pair Care with Dopamine
ADHD brains work better with rewards, not willpower. One of the easiest ways to make self-care doable is to pair it with something you already enjoy.
Try this:
• coffee = meds
• shower = favorite song
• skincare = podcast or comfort video
If you don’t do it perfectly, that’s fine. If you skip it entirely, that’s fine too. There is no punishment system here.
Halfway Is Enough
You do not have to finish the whole task.
• fold some laundry
• wash only the forks
• clean for two minutes
Half done is not failure.
Half done is progress.
Make Life Ridiculously Easy
You’re not lazy. You’re tired. You’re overstimulated. You’re adapting.
Make things easier on purpose:
• keep water next to you
• keep snacks where you sit
• put a trash can by the bed
Convenience isn’t cheating. Convenience is self-care.
Regulate the Body First
When anxiety spikes, logic usually doesn’t help right away. Your nervous system needs calming before your thoughts can follow.
Try grounding through your senses:
• cold water on your wrists
• pet something furry
• wrap yourself in a heavy blanket
• hold something textured
Calm the body first. The brain will catch up later.
One Tiny Promise a Day
Forget the overwhelming to-do list.
Choose one small promise you know you can keep.
One task. One moment. One gentle win.
Momentum grows from success, not pressure.
Rest Without Earning It
You do not have to be productive to deserve rest.
Rest is not a reward.
Rest is maintenance.
You’re allowed to stop. You’re allowed to lie down. You’re allowed to breathe without justifying it.
A Reminder You Might Need Today
You are not lazy.
You are not broken.
You are tired, overstimulated, and still trying.
And that matters more than you think.
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